stephen colbert twitter
Musk's Problematic Twitter Takeover | Barack Obama Is "Still Fine" | Lula Wins In BrazilWELCOME TO "
Updated on Jan 30,2023
Musk's Problematic Twitter Takeover | Barack Obama Is "Still Fine" | Lula Wins In Brazil
WELCOME TO "THE LATE SHOW." I AM YOUR HOST, STEPHEN COLBERT.,FIRST OF ALL,-- ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ),HAPPY HALLOWEEN EVERYBODY IT'S THE SCARIEST NIGHT IN,AMERICA, JUST ABOVE EVERY OTHER NIGHT IN AMERICA., ( LAUGHTER ) STILL RIDIN' A SUGAR HIGH,,WELCOME TO LATE NIGHT. DON'T FALL ASLEEP, NO MATTER,WHAT YOUR PARENTS SAY, BECAUSE THE MINUTE YOU GO TO BED,,THEY'RE STEALING ALL YOUR BEST CANNED.,I'M TALKING KIT KAT. KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING?,KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING? GIVE ME A BREAK., ( APPLAUSE ) YEAR?,I'M DRESSED UP AS MY DOG BENNY. ( LAUGHTER ),IT'S A VERY SPECIAL HALLOWEEN BECAUSE THE POWERBALL JACKPOT,HAS REACHED $1 BILLION. ( APPLAUSE ),HAS REACHED $1 BILLION. ( APPLAUSE ),BEEN THIS HIGH IN POWERBALL'S HISTORY.,BEFORE POWERBALL, OF COURSE, THE MOST POPULAR LOTTO GAME WAS JUST,BALL. THE WINNER WOULD GET A BALL.,THE LOSER WOULD GET TYPHUS. ALSO THE WINNER.,THE POWERBALL DRAWING OCCURRED AT 11:00 P.M. TONIGHT, WHICH IS,AFTER WE TAPE THIS SHOW. BUT I CAN ALREADY ANNOUNCE THE,WINNING NUMBERS: THEY ARE 4, 9, 20, 22, 69, WITH,A POWERBALL OF 20. ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ),YOU CAN TAKE IT TO THE BANK! HOW DO I KNOW?,BECAUSE THOSE ARE THE ONES ON MY TICKET.,SO THAT'S WHAT WON, REGARDLESS OF THE LIES YOU HEAR IN THE,MAINSTREAM MEDIA. ( APPLAUSE ),IF I WIN-- IF I AM CORRECT, I WILL SPLIT THIS WITH EVERYONE IN,THIS ROOM. ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ).,OKAY? THAT'S RIGHT.,OKAY? LIKE 95-5.,OF COURSE, I HOPE EVERYONE WINS. WE ALL NEED SOMETHING TO CHEER,US UP, AFTER THAT MANIAC BROKE INTO NANCY PELOSI'S HOUSE AND,HIT HER HUSBAND IN THE HEAD WITH A HAMMER.,NOW, PAUL PELOSI IS STILL IN THE HOSPITAL.,THANKFULLY, HE IS EXPECTED TO MAKE A FULL RECOVERY.,THE ATTACKER-- ( APPLAUSE )., ( APPLAUSE ) FEDERAL CHARGES FOR ASSAULT AND,ATTEMPTED KIDNAPPING, IS NAMED DAVID WAYNE DEPAPE.,WE'VE GOT TO STOP GIVING PEOPLE THE MIDDLE NAME "WAYNE.",IT NEVER ENDS WELL. DAVID "WAYNE" DEPAPE.,JOHN "WAYNE" GACY. OSAMA "WAYNE" LADEN., ( LAUGHTER ) IT APPEARS DEPAPE IS EXTREMELY,MENTALLY ILL AND HAS ALSO MADE RACIST POSTS ONLINE, INCLUDING,SOME THAT QUESTIONED THE RESULTS OF THE 2020 ELECTION, DEFENDED,THE FORMER PRESIDENT, AND ECHOED QANON CONSPIRACY THEORIES.,SO EITHER HE'S GOING TO BE INSTITUTIONALIZED, OR THE G.O.P.,NOMINEE IN 2024. ( APPLAUSE ), ( APPLAUSE ) COMMON IN AMERICA NOW, BUT,HERE'S SOMETHING I DIDN'T SEE COMING: DEPAPE IS FROM BRITISH,COLUMBIA. HE'S CANADIAN.,THAT'S HOW TOXIC OUR POLITICS ARE-- CANADA GOT A CONTACT,CRAZY. ( LAUGHTER ),TO "DUDLEY DID-WHAT?!" THE DISCOURSE IN AMERICA IS,ABOUT TO GET WAY WORSE THANKS TO NEW TWITTER C.E.O. ELON MUSK,( BOOING ) SEEN HERE WATCHING STREET,URCHINS SCRAMBLE FOR HIS DISCARDED CHICKEN BONE.,MUSK TOOK OVER TWITTER ON FRIDAY AND, IMMEDIATELY, THERE WAS AN,EXPLOSION OF HATE SPEECH, INCLUDING USE OF THE N-WORD ON,THE PLATFORM, WHICH JUMPED 500%, LEADING TWITTER TO CHANGE THE,LANDING PAGE FROM WHAT'S HAPPENING?,TO >> "WHAT'S HAPPENING?!?!?!?!",>> Stephen: THE COMPANY BLAMED IT ON TROLLS, BUT OF ALL THE,TROLLS ON TWITTER, NONE ARE TROLLIER THAN THE TROLL WHO JUST,BOUGHT IT, BECAUSE YESTERDAY, MUSK REPLIED,TO A TWEET FROM HILLARY CLINTON ABOUT THE ATTACK ON PAUL PELOSI,THAT CONDEMNED THE VIOLENCE AND CONSPIRACY THEORIES WITH A LINK,TO A HOMOPHOBIC CONSPIRACY THEORY BLAMING THE VICTIM OF THE,VIOLENCE. THAT'S NOT JUST AWFUL.,THAT IS BEYOND THE PALE-- AND SO IS ELON MUSK., ( LAUGHTER ) NOT SO MUCH MOBY AS JUST A DICK., ( APPLAUSE ) THAR HE BLOWS!,BOY, THAT MAKES ME MAD. I JUST WANT TO-- WHAT DO I WANT,TO DO, SPEAKER PELOSI? >> I'M GOING TO PUNCH HIM OUT.,I'M GOING TO GO TO JAIL, AND I'M GOING TO BE HAPPY.", ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) HELP DON'T CROSS NANCY.,IS THIS TRUE? I AM BEING TOLD THERE IS NEWS OF,MUSK BREAKING TWITTER, BECAUSE WE FOUND OUT TODAY THAT ELON,MUSK HAS DISSOLVED THE COMPANY'S BOARD AND CROWNED HIMSELF SOLE,DIRECTOR. THAT SOUNDS POWER-MAD.,BUT DON'T WORRY. BEFORE HE GOT THAT TITLE, HE RAN,IT BY THE C.F.O., ELON MUSK; THE HEAD OF H.R., ELON MUSK; AND THE,PERSONAL ASSISTANT TO ELON MUSK, ELON MUSK., ( LAUGHTER ) THAT'S IT.,IT'S DONE. ( APPLAUSE ),LET THAT BE A LESSON TO YOU, KIDS: IF YOU WORK HARD, AND,BECOME WEALTHY AND POWERFUL ENOUGH, ONE DAY, YOU, TOO, CAN,PAY $44 BILLION TO SIT IN A ROOM BY YOURSELF., ( LAUGHTER ) THE MIDTERMS, COMING UP.,THE MIDTERMS ARE A WEEK FROM TOMORROW.,THE RACE IS TIGHTENING, SO THE DEMOCRATS HAVE UNLEASHED THEIR,SECRET WEAPON: BARACK OBAMA. ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ),I KNOW. I KNOW.,CONSTITUTION. HE SPENT THE WEEKEND DOING,RALLIES FOR HIS PARTY, AND SOME LADIES IN MICHIGAN WERE INTO IT.,>> NOW, I HAVE TO ADMIT THAT SOMETIMES GOING OUT ON THE,CAMPAIGN TRAIL FEELS A LITTLE HARDER THAN IT USED TO, NOT JUST,BECAUSE I'M OLDER AND GRAYER. ( CHEERING ),OKAY. ( APPLAUSE ),YOU SAID THAT. ( LAUGHTER ), ( LAUGHTER ) POINT OUT, THAT'S TWO THINGS THE,45th PRESIDENT WILL NEVER HAVE: A CROWD SHOUTING HOW HOT HE IS,AND
The above is a brief introduction to stephen colbert twitter
Let's move on to the first section of stephen colbert twitter
Let Tikstar's experts help you find the best TikTok product on your Shopify business!
Find Influencer (It's Free)
WHY YOU SHOULD CHOOSE Tikstar
Tikstar has the world's largest selection of social media to choose from, and each social media has a large number of influencer, so you can choose influencer for ads or brand marketing without any hassle.
stephen colbert twitter catalogs
- GOP Knives Are Out For Mitch McConnell | Fake Corporate Twitter Accounts Have Real World Impact
- T**** Allowed Back On Twitter, Won't "Partake" In Special Counsel | Why Qatar Was A Bad Choice
- DeSantis Ad Implies He Was Chosen By God | Twitter Bans Users For Impersonating Elon Musk
- Twitter Blue Goes Off the Rails & Colorado Legalizes Shrooms | The Daily Show
- Trump Thinks The Migrant Caravan Is On Twitter
- The Colbert Report - Who's Attacking Me Now? - #CancelColbert
- This Tweet Trumps All Other Horrible Trump Tweets