The Ultimatum: Red Flags The Cast Should Have Seen Coming A Mile Away
when it comes to deranged dating shows,no one does it quite like netflix the,ultimatum is netflix's most unhinged,show by far and was full of red flags,that could be seen from miles away but,we couldn't look away this is literally,insane this is insane,the whole plot is toxic let's start off,with the craziest part of the show,premise having couples break up date new,people in front of each other live with,a stranger for three weeks in the same,apartment building as their original,partners going out partying with the,people now dating their exes and then,throwing the original couples back,together for three weeks before making,them choose between marriage or breaking,up what could go wrong right it's,unsettling and where are the therapists,why are you going through my phone right,now why are there multiple it's the,definition of chaotic and maybe even,toxic i need some like medicine or,something like i can't and we aren't,entirely sure if this is a healthy way,for couples to get on the same page when,it comes to making lifelong commitments,rey pleads the fifth,okay how about the fact that rey was the,one who brought her boyfriend zay on the,show saying that she was ready for,marriage and she wanted to leave the,experienced engaged to him but in a solo,interview rey is asked to explain why,she loves zay and wants to marry him and,she asks to skip the question i don't,know can we skip that question and come,back to it or is that the last one their,last dinner before the split featured,zay telling rey it doesn't make sense,that she issued the ultimatum and not,him saying i'm hurt that's all i can,really say the person that i love and is,supposed to love me can't even give me a,reassurance that she wants to be with me,99 bottles of tequila on the wall during,the 10 episodes of the ultimatum,madeleine was drunk most of the time i,love you madeline was messy and clumsy,throughout the show there were several,times where she was doing solo,interviews while out at a bar or,restaurant and visibly intoxicated and,even unable to stand up straight her,drunk nature brought her several,controversies i'm done,colby and madeline's toxic relationship,speaking of madeleine her entire,relationship with colby was a red flag,if you play with her you're not playing,with me,colby gave madeline the ultimatum and i,think madeline took the experience as,her chance to cheat before committing to,colby although she never got the,opportunity to cheat with randall it was,not for lack of trying i'm ready to go,make out with randall off camera she was,always making comments about needing to,be intimate with randall to see if the,attraction was truly there but he never,gave in madeleine was very outspoken,which led to many instances of,name-calling and yelling directed at,colby and the drinking didn't help colby,wasn't innocent in all of it though even,though he gave the ultimatum colby told,lauren that when he's with her he,doesn't think about madeline whatsoever,you sitting in front of me i can see the,potential and how long did he even know,lauren he took the experiment as his,chance to try and get with any woman,that came along and that was apparent,when he and zay got in the fight about,him kissing a girl at a bar and when,madeline confronted him for talking to,other girls alexis's smear campaign,against colby,alexis had one goal in mind when she,chose to sign up for the show she wanted,to get her boyfriend hunter to propose,before agreeing to move in with him,after meeting other cast members on the,show alexis realized the only other,person she was attracted to was colby,she assumed colby would be interested in,her since she has a few things in common,with his girlfriend madeline but that,wasn't the case and he rejected her,advances,i'm not,attracted to you and alexis took that as,him saying she wasn't attractive and so,the smear campaign began she even went,as far as approaching madeleine to say,even more negative things about him i,just think you can do like a hundred,percent better than colby and it didn't,stop there alexis had even more to say,about colby at her bachelorette party,during season one i'm so why you're with,him and when you're like this image you,could do like 20 000 times better nate,and lauren's proposal the entire thing,was,weird okay we said it lauren always said,she didn't want children and nate,focused his attention on women who,wanted to be mothers then during the,choice ceremony we watched as all the,women he wanted as his choices picked,other men are you kidding me he was,becoming physically uncomfortable as,rejection after rejection happened in,front of him he frantically mouthed i'm,going to pick you to madeline but,madeline had already made her choice it,was getting super messy then hunter,surprised everyone by proposing to,alexis and now it was lauren's turn to,make a choice and she was going to,choose colby and that did not sit right,with nate i don't trust colby so he made,a desperate attempt to stop col
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The Ultimatum: What Netflix Hid From Viewers
The Ultimatum: What Netflix Hid From Viewers
to say we are hooked on netflix's new,show the ultimatum would be an,understatement i don't know about you,but i was stuck on the edge of my seat,wondering what was going to happen next,but what kind of drama was happening off,camera that we didn't see,zay and colby fight for the ultimatum,production didn't have camera crews,following the couple's every move like,other reality shows do the creator of,the show has said this was a conscious,choice so that the couples could feel as,normal as possible but what's the point,of a reality show if you aren't going to,film everything anyways obviously,without the cameras rolling 24 7 they,are bound to miss a few or a lot of,things like what led up to the fight,with zayn colby we get the tail end of,it the next day when the boys are,arguing but allegedly zay convinced a,woman in a bar to kiss colby but zay,says colby did that on his own the thing,is we will never truly know what,happened because no one documented what,happened at the bar,cue the eye roll now,rey jake and april cliffhanger,netflix really left us hanging at the,end of episode one didn't they it was,when rey and jake were sitting at a,table at the restaurant getting to know,each other they had just started to get,more comfortable and jake asked rey to,sit next to him the very end of the,episode is april asking if she can join,them we were so looking forward to,seeing that drama unfold to just have,netflix pretend it never happened,episode 2 starts on a totally different,day with completely different people and,they never come back to it again in the,season some fans of the show say,production was so concerned with those,silver goblets that may as well have,been paid actors that they never stopped,to ask whether the timelines even made,sense,rey and jake's secret hookup when jake,met rey it became clear that the two,shared incredible chemistry and when,they moved in together they got,comfortable real quick it looked like,they were sharing a bed almost,immediately cuddled up together and,giggling and so inquiring minds wanna,know did they ever do anything more than,just kiss in an interview with us weekly,rey clarified that they never got,intimate with one another she said she,kissed him a lot but we didn't take it,past kissing jake doubled down and said,the only thing that they did was kiss he,said they slept in separate beds for the,first five days on the show but we only,saw footage of them cozying up in bed,together,what did rey do to zay off camera a feud,between couple ray williams and zay,wilson has been a hot topic of,discussion after seeing the start of a,physical fight between them episode 7,showed zay coming home at 8 am after,staying out all night and ray waited up,for him to return ray walked into the,next room while zay followed and,continued to keep the conversation going,the couple was out of frame so we only,heard the argument start to escalate,with rey saying let go of me when they,were off camera ray punched him and zay,allegedly shoved her,neither of which we caught on film sorry,i hit you earlier randall and madeline,off-camera smooches in episode 4,madeline reveals to the other female,castmates at dinner that he,intentionally kissed her off camera he,kissed me okay this eventually became,less of an admirable quality to madeline,and more of an issue because there were,times that randall would push,conversations about colby and expect,madeline to open up but he would be,vulnerable off camera he would only be,vulnerable off camera there's really no,telling how many times madeleine and,randall kissed because none of it was,caught on camera we only know of the one,time that happened for sure because,madeleine confirmed it colby and april's,clubbing even though colby and april,didn't pick each other they still lived,together for three weeks and we barely,got any footage from their time together,but colby and april did go out clubbing,during their time together it would have,been beneficial for production to at,least use the cast members social media,accounts or text messages or anything to,give us a clue as to what was going on,when the cast was out this was a reality,show after all hunter and alexis,proposal according to hunter the,producers were aware he was going to,propose he just had to come up with the,right moment but the show's creator,chris colin told e-news in an interview,that production didn't know the,proposals were going to happen so what,gives and we also don't know how much,time they spent with the rest of the,cast after the proposal episode the only,time we see alexis again is at her,bachelorette party with the girls in,episode 7 and we never see hunter again,with any of the guys,lauren and nate's proposal while the,group was celebrating hunter and,alexis's proposal nate got down on one,knee for what the group deemed as a,lackluster proposal to lauren it was,awkward and weird no doubt and it seemed,to come out of nowhere but lauren,provided today with context not seen in,th
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I Wrote a Song Only Using Your Instagram Comments! (i miss my friends)
I Wrote a Song Only Using Your Instagram Comments! (i miss my friends)
hi I wrote another song using only your,comments this time only your comments,from Instagram This song is called I,miss my friends why am I so bad at,intross,okay Hey booger this is the first time,I've put makeup on in two weeks,running baking reading cleaning meeting,sleeping dancing streaming cooking,painting meditating singing drawing,gardening playing pubg watching movies,ripping YouTube sharing memes getting,Dippers crying doing puzzles pinching,tiger cake,remember friends they were fun but now,you're gone more time less motivation,I can't remember the last time I went,out why is everyone obsessed with animal,crossing right now I've been staying up,till 3am and sleeping until now,I'm dressed up just to sit in my living,room,absolutely but surely going insane,never thought my dream of doing nothing,would come true when it came true,watching movies surfing YouTube sharing,means getting depressed crying doing,puzzles painting tiger gang,cause I miss my friends,cause my friends,do I do the YouTuber thing yet yeah sure,let's do it like this video subscribe I,have merch there's a link in the,description,never mind
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The Ultimatum Cast Where Are They Now?
The Ultimatum Cast Where Are They Now?
it's been a long time since the reunion,of the ultimatum and when it comes to,these people you know that their lives,will never be boring do you wanna yell,over me and you wanna threaten me first,once you're actually in the wrong so,where are they now,madeline and colby the couple definitely,seemed like one of the most on and off,during the show i knew she was the one,if you play with her you're not playing,with me,however after madeleine decided to,commit she committed all the way from,getting engaged to married on literally,the same day,oh my goodness,and one of the main things that she,stated during the reunion was that,they're not fighting for themselves,anymore they're fighting for each other,and their family trust,listen for sure,which is actually really sweet,and in may of 2022 they welcome their,first daughter josie the couple is also,planning on having a bigger wedding with,friends and family in the future alexis,and hunter though the couple left early,on in the season they've been going,strong ever since and i mean i would,expect nothing less because they,literally got engaged early and the,couple officially got married on june,18th,the celebrations were held in california,on a beautiful sunny day but one,question is where was the cast of the,ultimatum it seems as though none of the,ultimatum casts got an invite to the,couple's nuptials,awkward,i wonder how that made them feel,though alexis and hunter didn't do the,entire journey they were still there at,the reunion and to be fair they did have,kind of clashing opinions with some of,the castmates i'm not attracted to you,so it looks like none of them got the,invite,on the season finale shanique and,randall got engaged,since then shanique has come forward,saying that she was genuinely surprised,when randall popped the question because,she didn't know where he stood once we,like got out of this like,real life sets back in and even though,she gave an enthusiastic yes it didn't,take long for them to realize that there,were some fundamental issues in their,relationship then the couple ended up,splitting up for six months to grow and,work on themselves since then the couple,has been going strong but taken it slow,they have tried to take the pressure off,their relationship by taking it day by,day instead of giving it an ultimatum,and it's always a true sign of how much,people love each other when they realize,that they need to take a step back,figure things out and then come back,together to make the longevity of the,relationship work they seem so much,wiser beyond their years showing once,again that communication is key,zayn ray turned into a firestorm,though the couple originally ended on a,civil note at the reunion it was,anything but you always do this,and for those of us wondering why it was,as severe as a reaction as it was that,in parts of the reunion that were,actually cut out of the episode zay was,trying to out raise new relationships,not only was that not a great move on,za's part but on top of that rey's new,relationship was with a woman i've been,with uh one person she's amazing and so,rey knew that she would not only have to,address the new relationship but her,sexuality as well and that's a double,whammy rey also later came forward,saying that zay has blocked her on,everything sheesh talk about messi since,the reunion zay has stayed single on top,of that it doesn't look like things are,going too too well for him because he,got two duis and got arrested two days,in a row ray on the other hand seems to,be doing pretty well there is some,speculation that the mystery woman that,rey has been dating could be emily,walker however neither of them have,actually confirmed their relationship on,top of that rey had said that she would,be open to a relationship with jake down,the line and that they're still really,good friends do i smell some possible,tea here jake is still single though he,agreed with rey that it wasn't good,timing for them to start a new,relationship it is clear that he is,still hung up on her,okay,however he's still very much so enjoying,the single life and though he keeps it,pretty private on social media it seems,like he is living his best life right,now april on the other hand is in a,committed relationship with a man who,treats her right and makes it clear that,he wants to marry her the pair started,dating shortly after production on the,show ended and have been going strong,ever since she boasts about how,wonderful he is on social media and,isn't afraid to show a little pda,not gonna lie they're super cute nate,and lauren though their time on the show,was pretty controversial they are doing,way better off screen than they ever did,on screen thank goodness because even,they agreed that that proposal was,cringy the couple has gone to couples,therapy and agreed to have one kid,together and nate even reproposed to,lauren in a much more romantic setting,and they're officially getting married,on october 1st 2022,another wedding but u
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THE ULTIMATUM Netflix's Dirtiest Reality TV Show Made Me Appreciate Being Single
THE ULTIMATUM Netflix's Dirtiest Reality TV Show Made Me Appreciate Being Single
i knew netflix's latest cringe-inducing,reality show the ultimatum was going to,be great when i heard it holds the,guinness book of records for mentioning,boners,i touched the boner as well i didn't,know there were boners involved i got a,boner so obviously i was interested and,had to take a deep dive into love,because nothing says i love you then,issuing your partner an ultimatum is,this,like an ultimatum come join me in this,beautiful disaster of a show as we,answer the question is love blind oh,wrong show the premise of the ultimatum,is pretty simple get married or break up,with six couples all of whom being in,relationships of at least a year and a,half or longer with one person in each,couple wanting to get married and the,other holding out this is where the,ultimatum comes in i basically told,hunter we either get engaged or,we break up let's meet our totally not,unhinged or emotionally traumatized,couples shall we first is alexis and,hunter if hunter wasn't making enough,money that was reasonable i would walk,away,hunter is not perfect for husband,material yet because i make more than,him what are you looking to get out of,your,potential partner finances are like so,important to solidify marriage for me is,a financial decision because nothing,says love more than money this is alexis,and she's the one issuing the ultimatum,to hunter who isn't ready to commit just,yet right hunter i'm not ready to,propose to alexis at this moment but if,i met the perfect person,i,would be ready to be engaged tomorrow,second we have madeline and colby with,colby being the one to issue the,ultimatum i am worth her,whole heart and if she can't,see that,i need to find somebody else who can,don't let his sweet talking get to you,this man is a piece of work i don't,think houdini reveals his tricks and,that's what you just did,madeleine on the other hand wins the,award for most drunk i mean she's got it,pretty together when compared to some of,the others on shows like love is blind,hey my name is fred and i love him and,i'm so lucky,i'm gonna go watch your dude,you and your dude and i know you,i know you baby i know you,if you were to ever to actively go after,my husband,we then have april and jake my name is,april i'm a psycho ,and,if there's anything i need to find out i,will find out she's given an ultimatum,to jake who has different priorities i,want to travel i want to have fun,because everyone knows you can't do that,with a wife next is rey and zay i stay,in the gym i have a degree i cook i,clean and i know how to she's given,the ultimatum to zay who doesn't want to,rush anything i'm ready to get up,and just forget all this even happened,me too zay up next is lauren and nate,with nate totally unsure of what this,show is all about i was anticipating,like seeing crew of all these guys you,just want to my girlfriend,what the which is of course why he,was the one to issue the ultimatum to,lauren and want to be on the show i'm,ready to drink it's the only way i was,able to get through this show lauren and,rounding at the couples are randall and,shanique whose chemistry is about as dry,as my vagina it's here in the romantic,city of austin texas that the couples,will split up and have one week to,establish new connections with the other,contestants and just like my dating,experience the process can be downright,painful with some of the contestants,totally vibing while others you have a,wild side,horse out of a wild sock i like sci-fi,books yeah,what made you attracted to me your voice,for some reason like your voice is like,really raspy,i like that laugh,after a week of casual dates and,one-on-ones the contestants have to,choose someone who isn't their initial,partner to go on a three-week,accelerated trial marriage where they'll,move in together meet each other's,families and experience what life is,like with a totally insane person and,this choosing ceremony or whatever the,hell they call it is absolutely,hilarious nick here wants to choose,madeline and just look at her reaction,it's it's kind of like in elementary,school when the teacher mentions you're,going to be doing a group project and,you have to quickly whisper to your,friend to team up before you get matched,with that weird kid who snorts his own,dandruff speaking of nate man did they,do this dude dirty during this wild,ceremony he ends up proposing to lauren,saying that he's willing to forgo having,children if it means he gets to spend,the rest of his life with her you gotta,give madeline the award for best,reactions just take a look at her here,colby is a big disturber and i'm,here for it calling out nate's,spontaneous proposal to lauren as fake,and disingenuous after all just a few,minutes earlier nate told madeline he,was going to choose her you told me 10,minutes before proposing that you were,going to choose me and then april chimes,in with this absolute gem about nate,when we were having our conversations,that like instead of your eyes here like,you were looki
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The Ultimatum Cast Reacts To Season 1
The Ultimatum Cast Reacts To Season 1
the ultimatum had all the drama,imaginable and the reunion was full of,unexpected confessions but you won't,believe what else the cast has been,waiting to reveal so spoilers ahead,because we will be uncovering everything,it was hard to watch,why nate proposed probably not the,reaction you would want after getting,engaged with your significant other,nate's unexpected choice to break the,rules and propose to his girlfriend,lauren confused literally everyone this,made no sense for many reasons aside,from wasting everyone's time messing up,the process and being kicked off the,show but mainly lauren openly admitted,she never wanted marriage or kids with,nate i don't want children and nathan,definitely knows where i stand nate,explained his side professing this,experience made me realize like all,these amazing people here all the great,dates that i went on still no one held,the candle to lauren to me we continued,i just knew what i want already and i,knew that i wanted to be with lauren,recently the couple were super candid,about the real reason behind nate's,proposal lauren admitted she wanted to,get off the show she stated nate was,like i'm just gonna propose to you and,let's just ride off into the sunset and,let's figure everything out the moment,lauren realized nate was genuine when he,asked her she recalled nathan does not,cry i've only seen him cry two times in,his entire life so i started crying and,so i was like oh he really means this,text lies goodbyes,april and jake did not wind up together,with him choosing rey over her at the,finale when asked about jake's dating,life jake replied it's been what six,months since the show ended i'm still,trying to figure this out laughing at,jake's reply april opened up about her,heartbreak realizing jake had completely,moved on from her april revealed i could,tell immediately when jake and i moved,in that he wanted to be back with ray,she continued i was very distraught i,was at my lowest point april felt,disrespected because jake was still,keeping up with rey and not checking in,at her lowest point april continued it,felt like my three weeks was taken when,i was with jake jake was out checking on,ray going further to explain that her,time was wasted due to jake being so,checked out of their relationship after,the reunion jake accused april of,cheating on him he opened up to us,magazine stating i was open and honest,with her,she wasn't so much with me and i found,out a lot of stuff from other people he,went on i love ray death we we talk all,the time we're not dating or anything,like that still healing from everything,that was going on and trying to figure,out ourselves at the same time,quest turned unexpected april was not,sad for long though she was very excited,to announce her current romantic status,regarding her dating life april replied,cheekily i am in a serious relationship,and we've been attached to the hit,i've already moved in this is someone,who wakes up every single day with me,and says i love you i can't wait to,marry you ultimately she came to the,realization that all the pain was worth,it in the end because it took that for,me to be here where i am today since the,reunion april revealed that her,boyfriend is a real estate broker from,austin regarding her in jake's breakup,april admitted i think he's thankful for,it as well ultimately i feel like both,of us figured out our true selves,there's things that we need that we just,couldn't provide for each other and,that's okay new chapter for alexis and,hunter,newly engaged alexis and hunter were,happy to announce they are getting,married in june alexis had trouble,finding anyone who was interested in,choosing her regarding alexis's,inability to find a partner she explains,everyone has kind of paired up and i'm,like you know what am i supposed to do,here i'm freaking out because i don't,want hunter living with anyone else,regarding her strict rule when it came,to her husband making enough money to,live lavishly when asked about hunter's,ability to provide her a comfortable,life she replied that was a really big,thing for me now living together like we,both contribute equally regarding her,engagement and new chapter with hunter,she stated it was the happiest moment of,my life i'm so happy that it happened,that way,winning the ultimatum the most,surprising reveal of the reunion was,madeleine's new baby bump and engagement,to colby this couple had quite the ride,throughout the show in the beginning,madeline was very ready to see what else,there was to offer colby was absolutely,sure she was the only one for him she,gave it a shot with randall and it,seemed promising during the reunion,madeleine expressed that the unexpected,turnaround resulted in a lot of clarity,for her it's been an incredible,ultimately colby got everything he ever,wanted watch with caution,shanique opened up about her jealousy,witnessing randall date madeline,choosing her living with her and all,that went down behind closed doors,regarding
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The Ultimatum #2 - (Colby & Alexis) - Therapist Reaction
The Ultimatum #2 - (Colby & Alexis) - Therapist Reaction
hey deserve listeners the ultimatum,let's watch we're attracted to like,you specifically,your like eyes are like very fierce but,it was a little taken back with you know,letting me know,off the bat like i could never see a,future with you,what took you to that,place he colby i believe his name is,rejected alexis,she early on identified him as a,possible person to spend three weeks,with to see if he would be a good,partner,moving forward and he said yeah i'm not,feeling it so now they're having another,conversation where she's asking why and,which is great you know i think we don't,always have to have these conversations,but,i think that having these conversations,in a mature,non-accusatory way,can really provide a lot of emotional,closure a lot of learning you could,learn things like well you know when you,talked about how focused you were on,money and materialism it just turned me,off i don't know what you're going to,say,yeah it's it's a fair question yeah,definitely,obviously i'm bad at delivering certain,information but,i'm not,attracted to you,okay so there's actually a lot of,considerations when someone asks you,this normally we're being asked these,questions if we're breaking up with,someone whether it's five years of,relationship or five dates we might be,asked this question,often it's asked in a hostile manner,like why are you or a desperate man of,like why are you dumping me i don't,understand there's some considerations,one is to be honest that's a,consideration,why lie because,it's important for the other person to,have some solid foundation as to what,happened,if you've ever been broken up with,and had no explanation as to why it can,feel very,disconcerting because,we don't have a,landing zone for the narrative of what,happened,it's it's senseless it's like i don't,understand like what went wrong and,those question marks can plague us so,it's important a gift that you can give,someone when you're breaking up with,them or rejecting them that you give,them something to hold on to that,provides some narrative to the story,so telling the truth,is,a consideration on the other side of the,coin,is to consider not telling the entire,truth,because,if you tell the person,especially if you say in a very blunt,manner very,i don't know blunt manner you could,actually really hurt them long term for,example let's say,for,one example you,well let's use this one,he's saying i'm not attracted to you and,then maybe she's like well what do you,mean what are you attracted to and if he,would be honest what would he say like,your face i'm not attracted to your face,or whatever i mean that's or,now he could say your personality or,something,but let's say the conclusion that she,walks away with is she's not pretty,enough,well not everyone but for some people,a lot of people that could be,devastating and could really cause a,complex for someone,where,they feel inadequate they end up doing a,lot of extra things to try to change who,they are because they believe they'll,never find a partner with the way that,they look for example so,you know it's hard to know what to say,i generally will i mean every situation,is different,but,if i were his friend i would have,recommended he consider instead of,saying i'm not attracted to you,or,not only saying that saying something,like i just don't feel a spark when i,when i meet you you're you're a nice,person and,um obviously you're attractive but i,just don't really feel it you know,there's something about our vibe i just,don't really feel it you know that's,that's being truthful you're it's,essentially true you're not giving the,detail that i consider you unattractive,now maybe she can handle it uh let's see,what happens his ex and me,look the most similar of anyone here,number one number two,i'm not unattractive number three,that's your reasoning why you don't see,a future with me okay,now last episode we saw that she did not,take it well when colby rejected her,i can't remember what she said but,essentially she was saying you can't,reject me that's just not going to,happen and she was,hostile,so anyway she's saying she's arguing,with him saying he's not attracted to,her he's like she's saying,well that's ridiculous,it's not possible for you not to be,attracted to me because one,i look exactly like or i look very,similar to your current girlfriend which,in my opinion that's not true i mean i,guess you could say a white person with,blonde hair it pretty much ends the,similarities there in terms of,about you know that's just me and then,she says well let's rewind the most,similar of anyone here number one number,two,i'm not unattractive number three,that's your reasoning why you don't see,it number two i'm not unattractive,okay,you can have confidence and maybe,experience telling you that people find,you attractive but that doesn't mean,everyone finds you attractive,so that's a little odd and then let's,see what she says with the rest of this,future with me lies,lip service i'm not r
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hey deserver listeners the ultimatum,let's watch i want to be heard and it's,not about you know,you forgetting my favorite food or not,hearing you know not listening when i,tell you where i want to go for,a date,it's so much bigger,you know what are you in love with do,you really see me what if i up will,you run away,she is,opening up a pretty broad topic,very,reasonable i actually encourage couples,talk along these lines if they feel up,to it there's a lot of ways he could,respond essentially what she's asking in,part is,do you actually care about me do you,love me,do you really understand me do you,do you want to put the effort to,understanding me i think that's what,she's saying so that's good i mean,that's usually often what we want in a,romantic relationship here,because these are questions that i have,with you,i feel like you don't listen to me i,feel like you don't know me,right now we're getting to more,accusations and maybe that's accurate,but,if we use this as a jumping off point if,you feel this way or something along,these lines,you want to be careful as to how you say,it because if it comes across as hurtful,and an accusation and it feels unfair,all in all likely that's just going to,trigger defensiveness and,rejection from your partner and that's,not what you're looking for,you're,looking for the truth and you're also,looking to elicit the truth and when,people are defensive you're not going to,get that so,she just said i feel like you don't care,about my feelings something like that,another way to word that that would be,less likely to be interpreted as an,accusation and of course we can never,know how people are going to receive,things because sometimes people,will hear accusations where there are,none but,another way to put that is something,like,um and i'm a fan of caveats as i've,talked about before so it would be,something like i'm i have a question,about,whether or not you actually,care about,my experience and my feelings,but i'm not saying that you don't and,i'm and there's a possibility that my,sense my question mark around this might,just be due to my own issues and not you,know anything having to do with you,but i am curious if you,notice yourself or put effort into or,value actually caring about my feelings,what do you think about that,so you see the way that i worded it,there's a there's a lot of words in,there but sometimes you have to head off,possible interpretations of accusations,at the past by having all of those,caveats but anyway,now the way they're editing this he's,just,laying there,in a very dismissive way with a smug,smile,i don't know if that's what's really,happening sometimes they edit it in a,funny way but it would be consistent,with with what we've seen thus far so,i'm concerned as to how this,conversation is going to go i feel like,don't love me for me,what did you hear what did you,understand from that oh so he just,is laying there now maybe for him he's,done with the relationship and he just,is i don't want to put effort into,having this conversation because i'm,done,but let's see what happens here so she,has to say so i just said a lot of,things,what did you hear do you have any,reaction to that,i heard that you need me to listen,i heard that,you want me,to,really know who malin is even if it,comes with,flaws i would still need to be accepting,of that and still want to learn about it,okay good so he is i think accurately,according to her because she's nodding,he's like yes that was what i was saying,that's a good sign i didn't expect that,given what we've seen thus far,but,i think i should give kobe a little,credit because i think he has,exhibited this ability i think,when he's triggered that's when he,resorts to the kinds of defense,mechanisms that i've talked about in the,past in terms of,grandiosity dismissiveness,arrogance,mansplaining belittling but i think if,he because,well we could actually hypothesize that,the way that madeleine is coming across,to him right now,is less triggering for him and then he,doesn't resort to that defense mechanism,and he's more able to be functional and,empathetic and that's important to,understand about personality disorders,narcissism borderline others that,when that individual isn't being,triggered they're absolutely capable of,empathy and closeness and fairness and,all the things that you're looking for,in a partner,because often when we talk about,and i don't know if he has a,personalized or i've said that before i,don't know,they could all have,10 personality disorders they could all,have none i would have no idea because,there's no way of knowing from the show,but,i,at the very least what we could say,about colby is he has a tendency i think,when triggered to exhibit,a,way of acting that,seems as though he doesn't care let's,just put it that way for some people,they have no empathy psychopaths any,social individuals,they they don't care about other,people's feelings and they exist believe,me i've treated them but they
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